past – Our Tropical Living

People see you and judge and label you.

They think you have “style” although they do not know your story nor your current or past struggles.

They see you well dressed and well put together and think you have it all figured out.

They think you have money and the perfect life.

Back then

Growing up, I always believed things would get better.

I felt like I was living the wrong life and was born in the wrong era.

I saw my mom struggle alone in a house with three children since my dad was away.

She had to be both mommy and daddy.

I thought my mom had a perfect life because all she did was work whilst I had to go to school to learn.

Back then, I thought being an adult and working were better than going to school, silly me.

It is only as my mom died; I really internalized the struggles she faced.

I understood why she acted out and quarreled sometimes.

Deplorable

We were poor.

I was raised in an old house which looked like an abandoned structure.

We lived in deplorable conditions.

Our roof leaked when it rained. It was customary to use pans and containers to collect the dripping water.

The bed rocked and squeaked with every movement.

The cupboards were rundown and infested with roaches.

Poverty

I desperately wanted to join Girl Scout at primary school but my mom could not afford.

I watched Girl Scout gatherings so much that I knew all the road trip songs.

My mom gave me $1.50 daily for my break whilst at secondary school. My mouth used to be “long” because it was not enough.

It troubled me that the cake at the school was $2.00 but hey, I could not afford and had to be thankful.

My mom instilled the importance of going to school with home cooked meals instead of spending money on outside food.

I used to be upset I could not buy fried chicken and macaroni and cheese for lunch although I had my food.

Thank God Christine from my class brought me Dixie occasionally because her mom had a shop. I was thankful for the gesture.

We got by without a lot but we were a happy close knit family.

Encouragement

My mom encouraged her children to do well at school.

I woke up at 6 a.m. every Saturday to review my weekly notes whilst at secondary school.

My sister would always be surprised that I woke up early to study on a non-school day.

I would be studying with a tower of books on the table in our makeshift balcony.

Being raised in poverty and seeing the hardship my mom faced made me determined to excel in school.

My mom was my driving force and I did everything with her in mind- to make her proud and give her a better life so she could not work as hard.

I always told myself, “education was the way out for me because I had to remove my mom from that situation.”

Sophia Sonson

My mom was an independent, hardworking and trying mom.

I appreciate how much she did her best for her children.

She kept herself behind and did not depend on people to give her things for her children.

She did not leave us hungry. She made the most of the little food we had and always thanked God.

My mom refused to leave her children with her mother to go overseas to work when she got the opportunity.

She stated that life was hard everywhere but you have to make yourself wherever you are.

She constantly said that her children were her strength and she would not leave her trouble for anyone.

Regret

I undervalued my mom when she was alive.

There was so much I could have done to make her life better but I thought I had time.

Strive

I am proud of my upbringing.

I am not ashamed of where I come from. I proudly carry the teachings from my mom and use them in my daily life.

I know hardship and seeing people with things I could not have. I was not envious because I told myself my situation would improve.

All my life, I have made big sacrifices.

Education-wise: I went from losing sleep and weight, being stressed, taking loans, losing friends, missing out on family time and social activities and prolonging starting a family.

I have not seen the fruit of my academic achievements and hard work, but I am hopeful.

Eye opener

When you see people pushing themselves for better, it is because they know where they have been and where they come from.

Sometimes people are chasing themselves and their personal goals.

Do not think people are out to get you or catch what you have because sometimes, they do not have you in mind or see you as a threat.

You can turn your life around if you want. Stop blaming people for how your life turned out and where you are right now.

Catch up

Some of us made bad choices in our teenage years and it caught up with us.

Now, we hate the universe and blame everyone except ourselves.

Remember, when some of us were taking school for a joke, others were taking it seriously.

Some of us missed classes, partied, chilled with friends, formed relationships and had children.

Others did the same but also studied and burned the midnight oil.

Thinking cap

When you start achieving your goals and getting a paycheck, do not follow the crowd or listen to bad advice.

Be mindful about investing in a vehicle as soon as you start working.

A vehicle depreciates and is expensive to maintain. If you do not need but want a vehicle, stay without it.

Do not live it up and have a party life or constantly spoil yourself. Yes, you work hard but be wise.

Purchase property, join real estate, buy stocks, invest or save.

We are not perfect so we will do unwise things but catch yourself. Do not waste your hard-earned money.

Remember, you have come too far to go back to where you were.

Reems Sonson

Our Tropical Living

Come live and love island life

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Tag: past

Past struggles

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