Category: Lucians

Your jabal, a side piece

Call them the side chick or side man. They love their role, they do not care and they are ready to steal your partner and replace you.

Are you the other woman or other man? Is being with a side piece being in a real relationship?

A jabal as well as a side piece occurs when two consenting adults engage in a sexual relation without commitment whilst one or both are committed to other people.

Basically, it is someone that you are with other than your partner.

Having a side piece could be merely for sex, to have someone to converse with or someone to support you or you them in ways that you both desire.

If you are single, can you be a side piece to a partner who is already committed to someone else?

Excitement

Some people get a thrill of secretly seeing their side piece. They have someone to do anything they want to with no attachments. It serves as someone of convenience.

They enjoy that there are no strings attached, no expectations and no desire to continue the relationship in the long run.

They do not mingle in each other’s daily lives and both go their separate ways after getting together.

Guilt free

Some people are fine with being the side piece and feel no guilt or remorse. They do whatever benefits them if they get what they want.

They prefer the excitement of being the side piece instead of being in a serious and committed relationship. They do not want to be a full-time partner.

They do not want the responsibility of cooking, cleaning, caring for a partner and being present all the time nor the hassle of living together.

They see each other at intervals, have hot sex and make the most of the time spent together.

The side piece accepts themselves as being second best.

Selfishness, self-centered or infatuation

Some people have a need for sexual gratification with no restraints so desire a side piece.

Some people are obsessed with being secretive with someone else and get a sense of adventure from looking over their shoulder and sneaking around.

They prefer leaving family activities to answer calls or have quick sex. Secret meetings, steamy texts and experiencing passion with someone else become a turn on.  

What happens when emotional intimacy occurs? Do you become attached to the side piece?

Competitor or partner snatcher

Sometimes the partner in the committed relationship does not want the side piece to see other people nor have sex with them. They do not want to have any competitor.

The side piece even when single must remain faithful to the partner although the partner is with someone else. They ultimately become jealous when the side piece goes on dates with other people.

Some people enjoy stealing someone else’s partner for a fling or long-term fulfillment. Many times, a side piece is with their partner for years and no one knows.

Some people prefer to compete with someone else to get a partner.

To some, people are more desirable when they are already in a relationship.

Common knowledge

Some side pieces explained that they both define what the relationship is and where it is headed.

They explain expectations, desires and set clear boundaries so no one could be misled or sidetracked.

They ensure they know they are the side piece and that one or both parties are in a relationship with someone else.

They expressed that they sometimes secretly date a side piece for years. Now, it is common practice for a side piece to be introduced to immediate loved ones and go on public outings.

Sometimes the main partner is aware of the side piece and is fine with the entanglement.

Let us discuss

What happens when the side piece wants you to leave your partner to be with them?

What if the side piece calls and texts you constantly or shows up to your house and workplace?

Will the side piece blackmail you or threaten to expose the relationship to your partner?

What do you do when the side piece sleeps around, leaves you abruptly or acts like they are your main partner?

What if the side piece leaves their partner to be with you and expects you to do the same?

What happens when either one of you fall in love with each other?

Reems Sonson

Our Tropical Living

Come live and love island life

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Sharing Lucian men

The battle for decent Lucian men, let the competition begin

Do you think that “ghetto women” will now be pushed to date decent Lucian men due to a shortage of their kind?

Many young men are being killed in Saint Lucia and leaving young women with less men of “their kind” to choose from.

Statistics show that most of the recent killings are gang related and of certain demographics.

The heightened gang violence affects the number of men available for the women who prefer men who engage in criminal activity and live in the ghetto.

Some of these men are “bad boys” with a rough and daredevil manner which some women are attracted to.

They see no problem with the bad behavior portrayed and embrace these men for who they are.

What happens when these women no longer have these men to provide for them?

Competition

Less men in the ghetto might mean that the remaining men there will have multiple women to themselves. Women might also leave their neighborhood and seek the “bad boys” from the other ghetto communities.

Some women might no longer be interested in continuing to be with someone who participates in illegal activity hence might seek a decent man.

This will cause a competition between the ghetto women and the ordinary women as they seek men. Now, women will be on the guard because they have to compete to remain in a stable relationship with a good Lucian man.

Ripple effect

The ghetto women most likely will have no problem with fitting themselves in a family or between a couple. They merely seek someone to provide, feel a void and care for them.

They come ready to wreck homes and do not care because their needs which were once being met is no longer being fulfilled since their partner died.

They are fine with being the “side piece.” They have no problem with having sex with the men, infrequently spending time with them and getting money when necessary. They see what they do as a suiting arrangement.

The ghetto women promise lustier sex and sometimes offer sex for free with no strings attached. They may seduce the men and wear revealing clothing where nothing is left for the imagination.

The sexual advances they make at the men cause arousal and lust. Some men will be curious and interfere with these women to meet their sexual variety needs and satisfy their sexual appetite.

Decent wife or hoodrat

Sexual frustration and an unhappy marriage or relationship might make men be quick to get involved with these women and engage in extra relationships.

When the wife or main woman says, “I worked all day, I’m too tired” the jabal’s say, “come over when you are ready.” They are hardly ever too tired to please the man and meet his every sexual need.

The sexual acts the wife or main woman would not perform or would be coaxed into doing is done with ease and without persuasion by the ghetto women.

Win or lose

The ghetto women will be glad to share the men if they get what they want out of the relationship. However, the decent women might be problematic.

The women will fight over the men and get upset at each other. The men on the other hand, remain happy being with multiple women and having excitement from sneaking around.

Who will win the competition?

Please stop the violence!

Reems Sonson

Our Tropical Living

Come live and love island life

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Living in Saint Lucia- the struggles

Surprisingly, when I was a teenager I desperately wanted to move to the United States to have better quality of life, enhanced opportunities and do the many things I am passionate about.

Now that I am more than able to move and have many opportunities, I have so many doubts and question why I really want to move and whether I should actually move.

Perhaps I have not discovered the why. But, minus the nice weather, family and beautiful scenery, what is good about living in Saint Lucia? Living in Saint Lucia is very challenging, limiting and sometimes financially draining.

Reasons it sucks to live in Saint Lucia

High cost of living- groceries are expensive

Groceries are expensive in most countries but let us face it! The prices of groceries in Saint Lucia are ridiculously high given one’s basic salary. It seems like there is no price control and that businesses are exploiting consumers just to make an even greater profit. Some companies have monopoly so capitalize on that, only to overcharge for the products and services provided.

Stuck in one position

The culture in Saint Lucia is to move up the ladder based on “who knows you, who you throw beneath the bus, stepping on one’s toes, kissing butts and who puts in a good word for you.” Forget your years in service, experience and qualifications because these will barely secure you the job advertised or land you a promotion. You also remain in the same grade for decades before getting promoted.

Experience, years of service and qualifications are hardly recognized in Saint Lucia. Some work places prefer to rehire their retired staff or pay people from overseas much more money to do the job that you are experienced in, have been doing and can be trained further to become an expert.

The retired staff gets two salaries and the outsiders get perks yet sends their monies back to their country. Shocking! The long standing staff must accept the decision and still be motivated to work despite the unfairness in the workplace. Some employers have developed that, “take it or leave it” mindset because they forget that they too were once in their staff’s shoes. It is also more costly to hire and train new staff that may soon leave than keep the old but loyal ones.

Pay attention. Even when a position is advertised, it is already promised to someone that is not you. You apply, happily show off yourself, qualifications and think you are a great fit for the job but do not get it. Most times, the job opening is only advertised so management can say that it was advertised.  

Recognition of degrees and certificates

Some companies recognize degrees and certificates and even pay for staff to further their education but others do not. It is almost like going to school to get a degree or certificate to be in debt especially if you covered the cost. Sometimes you remain overqualified yet underpaid for the job that you do and do not get to use your degree or certificate.

Land and house

Owing land and house is extremely difficult in Saint Lucia especially if you have a family and have great responsibilities. Land and housing are very expensive. When you qualify for land and house loan, you may spend your retirement paying it off depending on your salary and that of your partner, if you lose your job or when life throws additional and unforeseen responsibilities your way.

High cost of healthcare

Health care is expensive in Saint Lucia and you may have to travel to seek further medical attention depending on your medical condition. Having health insurance helps reduce the burden but that too can be expensive if you cannot afford.

Sadly

Living in Saint Lucia means struggling till you die, breaking your back, living pay cheque to pay cheque, making ends meet and most times settling for less. It is a great opportunity cost where you have to weigh your options and you cannot do extra because you daily have to do cost-benefit analysis.

If you do not have a well-off family, marry into wealth, get a good inheritance, make big sacrifices, use your talents to self-sustain or have big connections then life in Saint Lucia will be a great test. The system is corrupt and makes it easy for most of us to fail.

Reems Sonson

Our Tropical Living

Come live and love island life

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Dangers of dating a Lucian woman

Lucian women are well known for their round behinds, sexy curves, ability to give a good “whine” on the dancefloor, beautiful skin, sweet personality, thrill and love for parties and adventure. Some Lucian women are highly educated, exceptional cooks and brilliant in bed. Read more https://ourtropicalliving.com/top-reasons-to-date-a-lucian-woman/

But, Lucian women can be very toxic and some do not appreciate good men and do not know how to treat men right.

Disadvantages of dating a Lucian woman

Some Lucian women are very promiscuous, flirtatious and have wondering eyes.

Some Lucian women love money, are very materialistic and want a man who can afford and take care of their every need. Some of these women will use you by whatever means necessary and do whatever it takes to get money from you. It can be to “make bucket” for chicken barks, for one Piton, to sponsor an event or for one outfit as my mom would say.  

Ah the biggest one! Some Lucian women will cheat on you and you will never ever ever know. They will not tell a soul about that unfaithful time! The women can be as sly as a fox so the possibility of getting a gros pwel is much higher when dating a Lucian woman. How many gros pwel have you had?

As you know, some Lucian women will give you boutins and never tell you plus you might never know that the child is not yours until a DNA test is done.

Some Lucian women love to be the jabal and do not want a man of their own. They love to share and do not want the full responsibility of having a man.

Some Lucian women have many “male friends!” Some of the male friends are on standby to call after you slip up or the relationship is over. It is almost as if the male friends are on a line to be with them although they say they are just friends.

Other women will be friends with a man, have sex with them, bring them to your home and you will never know. Surprisingly, sometimes the person they sleep with might be the person coming to your home the most, your friend, acquaintance, best friend and even family member. These women will deny the cheating until you have proof.

Women a part from sex, what do you bring to the table?

Some Lucian women are always too tired to have sex but are not too tired to do “daggering” with other men. These women are of course never too tired to clean, watch television or do something more meaningful to them at the time. Yup, some Lucian women fake orgasms and bad talk the size of your penis with their friends.

Some Lucian women want a new outfit, shoes, bag, hair and nails for each occasion that they most times want a man to sponsor. The latest thing is spending money on markup, photoshoots, renting a place for an event and customized t-shirts for every celebration.

Some Lucian women are liars and play the victim game. They make everything be about them, act like the world revolves around them, blame men for everything and even their wrong doings and bad behavior.

Some Lucian women like roro, do not want peace in the relationship but drama always. They cannot see things be nice and dandy.  

Some Lucian women call men soft when they are emotional and a detective when they are concerned. Mind you, the men are only a detective when the women have something to hide and are up to no good.

Some Lucian women deliberately have disagreements with men just to start a roro to do something they would not be able to do had they been on good terms with their partner. Just to say, “we were not talking.” Other women may look for trouble to spice up the relationship and bedroom because they are in need of some good sex and “freaky make up sex.”

My my, some Lucian women always try to get their way out of trouble so you will not argue with them especially if it is one they caused and it got too hot for them to handle.

Dem say man a wicked but woman a…

Some Lucian women will date you, know you have your family and expect you to divorce your wife and break up your family just to be with them. Some of these women will intentionally and maliciously get pregnant and trick you into believing that they are on contraceptives especially if you have plenty material things to offer.

Imagine that some of the Lucian women think all your female friends want you. They are even suspicious of your own family and others are secretly eyeing other women because they feel like they have competition.

Some Lucian women are not supportive. They know their men are ambitious, think ahead, struggle and work hard tirelessly just to provide for the family yet they complain. They say they feel neglected and like the man loves money more than the family.

These women might cheat and leave instead of seeing the bigger picture. The man’s hard work is just for a while, it will pay off, success will come and the man will be able to feed the family for generations.

Most times the men are working that hard just to maintain the family oui and would not have to work so hard if they did not have them in the first place. Women bear patience and be thankful for your hardworking man. Help him with the hard work too!

Finally!

Some Lucian women love to give silent treatment and hold grudges for things the other partner is not even aware of. A classic one is to say nothing is wrong and nothing at all when everything is wrong. Some of these women can spend months in the house and not speak to you.

Whilst it is true that some Lucian women are indiscreet, spoilt, jealous, love attention, want all your time, feel entitled and feel neglected quickly others are not.

Most commonly, some Lucian women love to party. Most of their free time is spent at a bar, places with music and food, on a boat ride or festive events.

The reality is dating and relationships are a gamble. Remember that the outcome of a relationship is unpredictable despite your purest intentions and that both men and women can be toxic!

Reems Sonson

Ourtropicalliving.com

Come live and love island life

This is not a paid or sponsored blog post but based on common discussions, my knowledge, experiences and encounters. This blog post may or may not apply to some or all Lucian women.

Also read

Top reasons to date a Lucian woman
Top reasons to date a Lucian man
Dangers of dating a Lucian man

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Top reasons to date a Lucian woman

Lucian women can be the sweetest people you ever come across. They can be caring, loving, supportive and give a helping hand whenever necessary. Finding the right woman can be challenging but here are some of the basic qualities in a Lucian woman.

Dating a Lucian woman depends on what type of relationship you want. Please! When you are interested and start talking to a Lucian woman, make your intentions clear and be known and say exactly what you expect from the woman.

Women cannot read your mind so do not be childish, play them or make them believe that they are in a relationship with you and that is far from what is and what you want.

Men-if you want a fling, someone to hang out with, have causal sex with no strings attached, want a committed relationship or a friendship or want to settle down, have children and get married then LET LUCIAN WOMEN KNOW.

Top reasons dating a Lucian woman might benefit you

1-Some Lucian women are driven, go-getters, goal diggers, well educated, confident, independent, have a good job and have good finances. Some of these women come well equipped- have their own home, vehicle and are basically “move in ready” for men. Other Lucian women are self-reliant, industrious and love to work for their own money but do not mind getting some money from you as well but will not make it mandatory.

2- Some Lucian women are good in bed, will give you a good “grind” and meet all your sexual desires. If you are helpful and beneficial to these women, pay attention to them and they connect with you on a deep emotional level, oh my! The sex will make your digits curl, your body get hot yet shivery and have you feeling like you are in “heaven.” It will have you going back for more.

3-Some Lucian women want time, attention, loyalty and someone who is caring and there for them. With these women, it is not about “the Benjamins.” It is just you and them against the world. Some of these women can be sensitive so spend as much time as you can with them because they are really good women.

4-The probability of getting cheated on or dumped is very high when dating a Lucian woman. Some Lucian women do not tolerate nonsense and if they do, then they are just playing along. This is beneficial to you because it will ensure that you take her serious and “behave yourself.”

5-Some Lucian women want stability, a good quality life, settle down and want to see your effort. These women make good wives and mothers. Some of these women are very compassionate and forgiving. Even when they get hurt, they will forgive quickly and move on after amends.

6-Some Lucian women love to clean, cook and make the house and family look presentable. Some of these women are easy to get along with plus you will get a hot, home cooked meal and clean house.

7-Some Lucian women love tough men and tough love. They want someone who could challenge them, put them straight, tell them how it is, be rough with them sometimes and “deal with them accordingly.” Sometimes you have to show these women your ghetto side.

8-Some Lucian women are classy, good looking, well-dressed and always want to look “sexy.” Some of these women are always flashy and in style, wear matching outfits and look like they were meant to be in a catalogue.

9- Some Lucian women are fun, adventurous, love to have a good time and love to show a good time.  Some of these women if not most, love family time, get togethers and being around loved ones.

There you go! Some Lucian women can be the best match so know how to treat these Lucian women right. Know the woman’s intention before you begin a relationship and how she plans to use you or incorporate you into her life before you get hurt and categorize women as all the same.

Question? What qualities are you looking for in an ideal Lucian woman? Which qualities do you want that are hardest to find in a Lucian woman?

Reems Sonson

Ourtropicalliving.com

Come live and love island life

This is not a paid or sponsored blog post but based on discussions with others and my knowledge, experiences and encounters. This blog post may or may not apply to some or all Lucian women.

Also read

Top reasons to date a Lucian man
Dangers of dating a Lucian man

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Dangers of dating a Lucian man

A Lucian man

Lucian men can be loving, caring, supportive, non-judgemental and good in bed but there are also drawbacks of dating a Lucian man. https://ourtropicalliving.com/top-reasons-to-date-a-lucian-man/

Some Lucian men invest a lot in women especially their money, time and resources. These women sometimes leave to be with another man or because they have already met their objectives. This scars men, make them label women and develop trust issues that they then carry into other relationships.  

However, most Lucian men usually see the early warning signs and red flags when they start dating a woman but believe that they will make her change. Lucian men need to own up to their decisions with the selection process they make when they choose to date a woman.

Special note: good looking women are more maintenance so choose your partner wisely!

Disadvantages of dating Lucian men

Some Lucian men have poor finances, are petty, laid back and have no ambition. These men are comfortable with their present situation and do not want to improve or make any adjustments for further success. They want to stay stagnant!

Lucian men can be very horny. In these men’s eyes women serve as bunnies. Some Lucian men do not perform house chores, give no help around the house and expect the woman to take charge of the household. House work can be tedious and tiring. When women live with these horny Lucian men they are expected to serve as a house maid and sex slave. What a combination! Moreover, these men always expect a hot home cooked meal.

Some Lucian men are unromantic, bad in bed, do not know how to make love nor use their tool. Yet these men expect women to “cum” quickly and be “wet” as soon as a sexual encounter commences.

The harsh reality is that many Lucian men do not want to get married nor settle down. These men will date a woman for many years and not marry her but marries the next woman that comes along. Some men might just get married after illness or in their old age.

Some Lucian men are not ready yet and are caught up with being a “momma’s boy.” These men live with their mom and want a woman to come over to have a good time and some might even ask the woman to move in too.

Some Lucian men love to drink alcohol, get drank and become physically abusive, stay at the bar with friends and love to sponsor drinks but hardly have money to take care of their family. These men prefer to hang out with their friends than spend time with their families. The bar, their friends and rum are their women.

Are we done yet?

No because some Lucian men are players, have multiple relationships and expect  women to accept it and be okay with their unfaithful and cheating ways. Plus some Lucian men are very flirtatious, have wondering eyes and love to stare at women’s behinds. These men although in a relationship love to send chats to women, make advances and “psst” women when they are passing.

Some Lucian men have outside children that they want women to accept as their own and even want women to coparent that other child.

Oh my, many Lucian men carry lots of baggage that women have to unload. Do not forget the baby momma drama and having to deal with all the exes.

Some Lucian men are liars and are emotionally unavailable so it is difficult to get through to them and connect emotionally. These men will lie to women even if there is proof and the woman saw with her own naked eyes.

Some Lucian men are lazy, want to eat women’s money, be dependent and are looking out for a “sugar momma.” These men want a woman to spoil them rotten and do not want to give the woman anything in return. Except sex of course.

Some Lucian men rather feed another woman’s child instead of their own child and rather pay child support instead of taking care of their child’s direct needs.

Some Lucian men are likely to get tired of their main woman and leave for another woman.

Do you agree or disagree with this blog post? Comment and leave your input. Share and tell a friend to tell a friend.

Reems Sonson

Ourtropicalliving.com

Come live and love island life

This is not a paid or sponsored blog post but based on discussions with people and my knowledge, experiences and encounters. Please note that I support all Lucian men, I am pro-choice and that this blog post may or may not apply to some or all Lucian men.

Also read “Top reasons to date a Lucian man.” Look out for Part 2 because some people said I did not give adequate reasons and they want more because it was a “hot read.”

Top reasons to date a Lucian man

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Top reasons to date a Lucian man

Today I am shredding some positive light on our fine Black men.

Limited “useful” men

Finding a decent man to start a family with, build a future with and invest your all in has been within its challenges. Now more than ever it seems difficult to find a good Black man. It is even more difficult to want to continue dating Black men after being hurt many times.

There are many men who have died, are incarcerated, are gay, migrated, already in a committed relationship, joined the army and the balance are players and not interested in a serious relationship.

Who are straight women going to date?

Support our Black men

Some media outlets have portrayed Black men as being angry, sex offenders, murderers, thieves, abusers, drug addicts, promiscuous, in extreme poverty, socioeconomically deprived and prone to poor mental health and with a blurred future. This paints a negative image of our Black men and sometimes subconsciously affect how we feel about them.

Black people we need to support each other instead of fighting our own race. We need to stop the racism towards each other but rather love each other.

Top reasons dating a Lucian man is beneficial

1-This reason tops it for me so no need for an explanation. Lucian men are good in bed and well endowed. When you develop an emotional connection and deep attraction with a Lucian man, your every body part tingles when you see them.

2-Lucian men may have fears and insecurities and guard their emotions due to past trauma and bad relationships but as they gain your trust then they become devoted. They continuously work to ensure a successful relationship.

3-Some Lucian men may not be the wealthiest but they try to keep the romance, give you their time and keep a healthy relationship as best they can. A trying Black man is an ideal man.

4-Lucian men are loving, understanding, easy-going, supportive, pay attention to you and can make you their secret obsession. Lucian men can touch your soul and make your heart smile.

5-Lucian men are non-judgemental, can make you feel safe and you can be yourself around them and display all your bad habits because they accept you for who you are.

Women and false ideation

It is not a man’s job to make you happy. Women you are responsible for your own happiness and a man should be a contributor to your happiness. Women stop having a movie-like, fake or social media ideology of what your relationship should look and be like.

What you see out there is most times unreal and painted to fool you and change your mindset. Envy your relationship, work to improve it daily and not that of others. Do what works for you so you can be happiest.

Special note: the top reasons to date a Lucian man may or may not apply to all men.

Do you agree or disagree with the top reasons? Share and leave a response.

Also read

Dangers of dating a Lucian man

Reems Sonson

Ourtropicalliving.com

Come live and love island life

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This is not a paid or sponsored blog post but written based on multiple discussions about dating Lucian men, women’s expectations and men’s roles in a relationship.